In my exhaustion I give myself time to reflect before falling asleep. I can't help but wonder at how the 20 of us seem to think the same things at the same moments, as if we are bound now by more than our mission. We are bound by a chain of thought. Our minds travel from one link to the next together, as our bodies from one country to the next. We think of the people we love, those who love and wait for us, mistakes we have made, the good we can do, and the things we can change in ourselves as human beings as an honor to those who have believed in us.

Today, despite my physical weakness and pain I think of the many ways God speaks to each of us and how important it is to learn and to listen for His messages. I think of Jin and his tireless dedication to the 20 of us and the cuase itself. He makes the effort to come to each of us, to be there for us, support us emotionally, give us advice. He speaks to us of his love for his late wife and the
emotion in his words make me yearn for that same experience in my own life. To have the opportunity to give such a great love, and to have earned the respect so fundamental in maintaining a love so rare is such an enormous gift in this life... so important as to eclipse my thoughts of anything else.

I run and listen to my music, each song a dedication, a message to me from someone who loves me, or from me to someone I love, and I carry the weight of the mistakes I have made that have kept me from having earned the respect necessary to have maintined these loves. And I carry with me as well, the weight of the world water crisis, like a cross, and I run toward my own redemption as fast as I can.